I cannot watch my thought
Rudolf Steiner says so
Yet I can watch the dust mote fall
Through the air as I write this
Yes I am able, to watch, and to write
At almost one and the same time
Yet, to view that thought just then about you
No, no that is no longer possible
I could go back further in time
Maybe find a photograph for reference
Yet however strong the concentration
That thought, in real time, would not be visible
Yes I could imagine walking, on firm rippled sands
Even to be running, towards the Machair, in the rain
Yet, as I think I thought these thoughts
I cannot see my own thought processes
I will myself, to make certain things happen
And already you may know where this is going
Yet it seems that I cannot help myself
No matter that I cannot see through to the thought
Yes, nostalgia may interrupt, or interject
Messages might arise from deeply buried memories
Yet no amount of persistence, or even shadow boxing
Will let the ether of me, see the fading thought of you
