I do intend to begin the new year

I do intend to begin the new year

With a more inward looking journey

Which is what I am trying to realise

That is, this is what I hope to find

I am not alone in having lost a lover

Of that I am 100% certain

I am though entirely alone in dealing with it

In the way which I try to deal with it

I know that it goes dark outside

Also that that happens earlier

In winter rather than in summer

I know too that loss goes darker

If all that I am is all that I am

Then what am I to worry about

But if I also try to include you

Does that not create a new story

Once upon a time, long ago

I did include you

Indeed thoughts of you preceded all

Which was, perhaps, a little bit wayward 

I was going to have just one more

I was going to have just one more

But then, out of the Celebrations

Bumper Christmas re-seal packet

My hand emerged with a Twix

And a Mars bar, honestly

I had no choice did I

I hate the Twix first

But then, I thought of Fee Griffin’s poetry

Another Christmas gift

But from a more familiar source

Who also gave me

The Hero With A Thousand Faces

Only two of which I will use

To tell you that today is Sunday

And the sun shines brightly

To ward off storm Bella

Who is the real reason why

I did not go for a walk instead 

I did not go to the Mountain

I did not go to the Mountain

To see the Four Colours of Rock

Neither did I walk around

The Basket Dew Pond

I did not enter the Guardian Shelter

Of woven hazel plastered with mud

Neither did I traverse by the Cuckoo Dome

Which interleaves the inside with the outside

The Shelter for Dreaming though lives on in me

I borrowed it’s name for a poetry collection

It almost became that basket

Which lies between this death and that life

The Tumulus on the Downs

Came before I walked there

Similarly the Air-Vessel Canoe

Had more space than I could hope to imagine 

A few lines

A few lines

Before meditation

Before bathing

It is Christmas Day

Chocolate wrappers

Point to last night’s indulgence

That Raymond Hurley

Plays on the stereo

Says something also

Not that peace and goodwill

Are ever frowned upon

But today, well…

For some it is a trip to the beach

Even a dip in the sea

But for me it is the pen, the paper

The sweets, oh yes, and a pot of tea 

My mind rotates, it always has

 My mind rotates, it always has

With an urgency, a desire

For a swift completeness

Of the business at hand

The buzzing bee defeats all hope

Of quiet contemplative writing

Where ample time would be taken

For reflection and deeper consideration

No, it must be done quickly

It must be put out there

Before it is anywhere near fully formed

The energy of the moment must dominate

This hectic, hurried, muddled approach

To words is my gift

It is what I must give to you

Straightaway